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4:34 p.m. - Friday, Sept. 12, 2003
I can dream can't I?
The reason I felt the need to go on about how I like men in my last entry was less about personal declarations and more about describing the two gorgeous guys that run a gym near my home.

I got a flyer in the mail that said it didn�t matter if I had to lose ten pounds or a hundred, I�d fit right in at their gym. And so, for a mere fifteen dollars a month, I decided to put that little blurb to the test. I went over in person and walked up to the desk. Sitting behind it was a young guy� I guess they�re all young to me. Strangely, he had shaved his head, but even with a bald pate, this guy was terrific. You know.. people who work at gyms spend a lot of time working OUT in gyms. He wasn�t very tall, and he wasn�t all lumpy or thick, but he was obviously strong. There are tanning beds there too, so he was tanned. I assume all over. I can�t help finding it a little funny that we have tanning beds here on the very beach of southern Mississippi, where the sun will burn the rag top right off a convertible. But we do, and he was a regular in the tanning bed. I guess in a word, the guy was really really healthy. And it only took me a few seconds to realize that the big shiny Harley Davidson leaning on its kickstand outside belonged to him.

Well, I�m not one for being tongue-tied. Quiet maybe, but never tongue-tied. The only times it�s happened that I can remember has been within the last few years, and it�s always been in the presence of a guy I�ve felt really attracted to. It�s kind of maddening.

The moment he looked up from his newspaper.. yes the guy was READING� I ran out of words. I just kind of stared stupidly for a half count before falling back onto the one thing I had been running through my mind in the car on my way to the gym.

�I�m here to fit in�, I said. Pointing to the words �100 pounds�, I quipped, �I�m this one�.

I�m not sure he saw the humor, but he smiled anyway and asked me to wait while he called the owner, who appeared after a moment, from the back office. He was young too, with thick black hair, the same tan, and teeth that sparkled like his dad was a dentist. Something about the way he dressed and carried himself suggested that he was used to things a little more expensive than his employee.

I spent almost two hours there the first day. One hour while gleamtooth tried to gently guide me into a two year membership in a gym that hadn�t existed a whole three months yet. I actually felt guilty for listening to my own good sense, but since I�ve been around the block once or twice, I did have the brains to flip to the back of his little presentation book, point to the six month membership and say �I want this one�. A two year membership is only a two year membership if the gym survives. The second hour was spent with easy rider showing me how to use the machines (I already knew, but I wasn�t letting on) and which muscles we would be working on. I won�t say I was distracted, but I will admit that I didn�t remember a single thing about the routine he devised with me. I still have to look at the sheet for every exercise. I�ts just the dumbest thing. ON the outside, I am a homely fifty-four year old woman but on the inside I�m a giddy teenager. I wonder if I�ll ever catch up with myself. I wonder if I�ll ever get used to having a man treat me gently.

I knew right away, of course, that there�s no future for me and easy rider or gleamtooth. We live in different worlds. But.. all is not lost. I�ve been back twice now and guess what�.. the joint is a place where guys my age go too. Yes, that right� guys my age who are trying to keep their bodies in top shape. Never has working out in a gym seemed like such a good idea for me. As of right now, I have a feeling those boys are going to lose money on MY six month membership because I�m going to be there every day, wearing the wheels right off that exercise bike.

And that�s why I had to start out by saying I like men.

Oh� and as long as I�m on the subject� I�m going to see a boxing match tomorrow night between two of the prettiest men ever to study the sweet science. DO I care who wins? What do you think? It�s Oscar de la Hoya vs Sugar Shane Moseley. De la Hoya is just the cutest thing. I�ve been watching him for several years now. SO you can imagine my delight today when I got an e-mail that said �a note from Oscar de la Hoya�. Oh sure, it wasjust an advertisement from HBO about the fight but hey� it�s a kind of connection with Oscar, wouldn�t you say? Right? Like someone at HBO who knows someone who knows someone who knows Oscar also knows my e-mail address. So it�s like getting a note passed from hand to hand from say, Mars, to me. I guess that all by itself is enough for me to root for him in the fight.

Oscar de la Hoya sent me a note�. Wow!

Happy Thoughts, Deep Breaths,

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